Finally decided to start posting again after a long hiatus. Happy New year everyone! Hope everyone wished big for 2013 and are starting to fight for their dreams! I have just graduated from high school and now I am on the road to adulthood.. which couldn't be more scarier. A lot has happened since I last posted and I guess this is my public online diary, so I might as well share what has happened ^^.
Graduating highschool was not easy, it was the worst time of my life. I procrastinated throughout the whole year and left assignments and studying for tests at the last minute. I lost my motivation for wanting to be a doctor but I still have that dream and always will. Hopefully I will make it into University and study something that I love, something that I will be happy with for the rest of my working days. I am going to miss all of the year 12s and the crazy times we have all shared together, some through primary school to high school and some through only high school. I love everyone and wish everyone the best for their future endeavours. Thinking about it now makes me slightly emotional, I am really going to miss waking up early and struggling to put my uniform on the correct way for school each morning. Walking through those gates and wishing I was back home sleeping, dreading classes everyday knowing I haven't finished my assignments or I haven't studied for a test. Having heaps of laughs and acting like complete idiots with my friends. Bitching about the lower years and how sheepish they all are. I made memories that I will never forget at that high school, falling over all the time, falling up and down the stairs, losing my locker keys or just leaving them in the locker lock itself.
I also turned 18 and experienced many hangovers which I never want to experience again. I also got alcohol poisoning once and that was defiantly not something I will have again. I danced so hard my shoes soles broke and i was only walking around with material around my foot, that was very embarrassing. I also remember everything I did, so I don't understand how people complain about not remembering anything after getting drunk, when to me I can? Ohwells.
At the end of the year, I fell in love. That was probably the most significant time in the whole of 2012. One day I was at home on the computer talking to the usual people, then all of a sudden some random guy messaged me. We were friends on Facebook, however, I had no clue who he was. Before messaging back I checked his Facebook to see if there was any chance of me knowing him. But it was completely random. So I messaged him back and said no do i know you. Anyway he was from the same city as me and coincidentally lived not that far away. We kept messaging back and forth until it was bed time. I thought after that we would never message or talk to each other again but surprisingly the next day I got a message from him. I was happy because I felt like he wanted to talk to me and that he seemed to be interested in talking. At first when we talked it seemed like he was kind of cold… but after he seemed really sweet, like a teddy bear made of candy. We continued to talk every day and soon I could feel my heart beating for him. He made me smile and each day I would wait for him to message me. Even if it was a late message I would still feel really happy. When we talked it seemed to click, we could talk for hours and it seemed like only a minute. I knew I started to fall for him when I would constantly think about him and wait for his reply or message. I could feel myself losing the strength I put up because of my previous relationships. The wall I put up from falling was decaying into nothing. I hoped that he felt the same way I did for him and for some reason, I could feel that he did. He was cute and showed true emotion, something other guys lack or can't show genuinely. The cheesiness he showed made my heart flutter, it felt good even though it was incredibly cheesy. I wanted to be with him but I had to play it cool. Haha I am so gay, play it cool, so gay. Anyway I kept my distance and but tried to keep closer. I was waiting for him to say he liked me and to ask me out. He was really handsome to me and he acted really cute. I remember the first time we talked on the phone and he was hyperventilating because he was shy. It was so adorable and I just wanted to hug him. After awhile he asked me to be his gf and i was so happy. I finally found someone who I clicked with and wanted to be with. He makes me happier than anyone else could. He makes me laugh at his stupid actions and words. He makes me cry for him and can make me angry over him. He triggers every emotion in me that I know that we are connected. I always feel special to him because he tries to make me happy and to feel that way. He tries to make me smile each day but even without him trying I still smile. I started to fall in love with this guy, and I couldn't stop it. I fell for him, I fell in love with him for who he is and how he makes me feel. My love for him makes me feel like we are soul mates and that we are supposed to be together. He makes me feel like I have a great future ahead of myself and not only that with him. I love how when he's angry he pulls me closer and doesn't push me away. I know one thing its that I can never stay mad at him because when I am all I can think about is how much I love him. I can feel that he loves me to by the stuff he says and the stuff he does. He's the man every girl dreams about through all of their life, the prince. Someone to be there for you through tough times, someone to hold your hand through the complications of life. Someone to care for you and never want anything to happen to you. Someone who can light up your life just by being around. Someone who would do anything for you and everything to be with you. This guy is my prince, and I know this because I can feel it. Eventhough I am still young, age cannot defy emotion and cannot limit one in falling in love. This guy's name is Colin. I love you Colin, and I always will, you make me believe that the life and the world can be a great place, and that true princes exist.